Sky Arts Portrait Painter of the Year pits a dozen talented painters against each other as they paint the same portrait (or three different portraits, as they're grouped into fours), as the accomplished artist Tai-Shan Schierenberg offers his views (there are other judges, but I only really listen to Tai-Shan). He's brilliant at describing the form and mechanics of creating an image, and how paint is expressionistic. I feel inspired to pick up the paint brushes!
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Tai-Shan Schierenberg Self-Portrait
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Game of Thrones is hilarious - majestic, swooping helicopter shots of astonishingly beautiful landscapes, men getting beheaded or set on fire by giant ice zombies, or beheaded and then set on fire by giant ice zombies, dragons circling the skies above writhing orgies (with real porn stars) as men get beheaded and then set on fire by giant ice zombies who in turn are incinerated by fire-breathing dragons kept by a woman named Dennis. It's a hoot.
Special Forces: Ultimate Hell Week sees a platoon of incredibly smug fitness fanatics put through bruising, exhausting physical and psychological torture by elite special forces soldiers from across the globe, but most effectively from Eastern Europe, where they kill you with their thumbs if you don't salute fast enough. I like scoffing biscuits and cuddling the kitten under a duvet as I lazily watch arogant triAthlon runners from Essex starve through the long, rainy night on greuelling twenty hour runs up hill while Polish nutcases throw rocks at them.
The Bachelor has thirty beautiful but delusional women gravitate around America's least articulate or interesting schmuck in an experiment to see how funny it would be if he genuinely thought they were into him, rather than being on a gobsmackingly tacky and offensive television show for the money and exposure. It's funnier than Game of Thrones, but less believable.
